Well, maybe a barge carrier longer than the Jahre Viking is a little ridiculous. But on the bright side, it can carry the USS Iowa with room to spare.

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Schwarzwald,
Displacement:
352,626 t standard
Dimensions: Length overall / water x beam x draught
1,596.79 ft / 1,555.77 ft x 196.85 ft x 49.21 ft (normal load)
486.70 m / 474.20 m x 60.00 m x 15.00 m

Armour:
- Belts: Width (max) Length (avg) Height (avg)
Main: 14.0" / 356 mm 1,011.25 ft / 308.23 m 16.84 ft / 5.13 m
Ends: 11.0" / 279 mm 544.50 ft / 165.96 m 16.84 ft / 5.13 m
Upper: 9.00" / 229 mm 1,011.25 ft / 308.23 m 8.00 ft / 2.44 m
Main Belt covers 100 % of normal length

- Armour deck: 7.00" / 178 mm, Conning tower: 16.00" / 406 mm

Machinery:
Nuclear, steam turbines,
Electric motors, 3 shafts, 725,616 shp / 541,310 Kw = 33.00 kts
Range unlimited at 32.00 kts

Complement:
42-52

Cost:
£120.873 million / $483.491 million $4 billion+ in 2017

Distribution of weights at normal displacement:
Armament: 0 tons, 0.0 %
Armour: 54,208 tons, 15.3 %
- Belts: 17,155 tons, 4.8 %
- Torpedo bulkhead: 0 tons, 0.0 %
- Armament: 0 tons, 0.0 %
- Armour Deck: 35,327 tons, 10.0 %
- Conning Tower: 1,726 tons, 0.5 %
Machinery: 24,047 tons, 6.8 %
Hull, fittings & equipment: 267,282 tons, 75.4 %
Fuel, ammunition & stores: 8,860 tons, 2.5 %
Miscellaneous weights: 0 tons, 0.0 %

Overall survivability and seakeeping ability:
Survivability (Non-critical penetrating hits needed to sink ship):
1,665,282 lbs / 755,359 Kg = 15,419.3 x 6 " / 152 mm shells or 46.2 torpedoes
Stability (Unstable if below 1.00): 1.38
Metacentric height 24.3 ft / 7.4 m
Roll period: 16.8 seconds
Steadiness - As gun platform (Average = 50 %): 58 %
- Recoil effect (Restricted arc if above 1.00): 0.00
Seaboat quality (Average = 1.00): 1.16

Hull form characteristics:
Length to Beam Ratio: 7.90 : 1
'Natural speed' for length: 39.44 kts
Power going to wave formation at top speed: 48 %
Trim (Max stability = 0, Max steadiness = 100): 50
Bow angle (Positive = bow angles forward): 0.00 degrees
Ship tends to be wet forward

Ship space, strength and comments:
Space - Hull below water (magazines/engines, low = better): 23.8 %
- Above water (accommodation/working, high = better): 293.4 %
Waterplane Area: 272,797 Square feet or 25,344 Square metres
Displacement factor (Displacement / loading): 346 %
Structure weight / hull surface area: 775 lbs/sq ft or 3,785 Kg/sq metre
Hull strength (Relative):
- Cross-sectional: 3.38
- Longitudinal: 1.94
- Overall: 2.23
Hull space for machinery, storage, compartmentation is excellent
Room for accommodation and workspaces is excellent