GRAINGY SECURITY BREACH REPORT
9/18/25
Canadian Facility
At 0330 HRS, Security Personnel reported that a secure entry door was remotely unlocked.
The request was made by an IP that resides at 71°44'50.2"N 101°13'13.4"E In Novaya, Russia.
Although the system initially denied it, the security system that manages the door locks disconnected for a period of thirty seconds.
The system then went into a recalibration phase, in which a second request to the system was made, and due to the system being busy with recalibration, it granted access to open the door.
A security flaw that has not yet been reported to site security.
The door remained unlocked for five minutes until security personnel noticed it while trying to figure out what happened with the system.
The investigation is OPEN.
END OF REPORT
@Ashdenpaw1 there’s an asterisk to that, then. A false call.
That asterisk is me.
@Graingy
I can always tell a femboy or gay person
I’ve accidentally outed many people by prediction
@Ashdenpaw1 Who's the simpleton here?
You make claims, allegations, in contrary to the core nature of a rock.
You see everything through the lens of flesh and none else. For that you are pitiful, or rather would be had there been anything within you to pity.
@Graingy
It remains indubitably plausible to identify as homosexual, whilst simultaneously experiencing an incapacitation regarding the execution of the sexual congress, you egregious simpleton.
@Ashdenpaw1 I gotta be honest, being called gay in eloquent language by a furry was not on my bingo card.
Regardless, such a thing is simple impossible: as a rock I do not have a sex.
@Graingy
I must implore you, sir, to take your leave forthwith, as I harbor suspicions, however unconfirmed, regarding your proclivities, which may, hypothetically, lean towards expressions of same-sex affection, a matter which, I must emphasize, is purely speculative.
@Ashdenpaw1 Aight, I’ll resume the music.
@Graingy
Regrettably, it appears our sole recourse lies in the resumption of offensive maneuvers against the aforementioned entity.
Seeing as you’ve tried (and failed miserably) to compromise our security several times, it should go without saying that you’re not considered remotely trustworthy.
@Graingy
I harbor an aspiration to integrate myself within the esteemed security apparatus of the Graingy corporation, perhaps not as the principal director, but rather as a sentinel of some description, safeguarding its invaluable assets.
@Ashdenpaw1 Who? You or us?
@Graingy
Definitely profiling huh
@Ashdenpaw1 Haha no. Not a chance.
@Graingy
Noo..
Like.. maybe lead of company security
@Ashdenpaw1 I have no idea what you fit into. Cosplaying as a very short Minotaur? Patrolling the sewers?
@SCtheONE AshdenPaw1 wishes to attempt cyber warfare against Graingy and is doing a laughable job.
@WaterFlavouredSpitfires Pardon?
That damn graingy TSA
@Graingy
Idk, something I fit into. Maybe defense or something idk.
What does this mean
@Ashdenpaw1 Uh... What position? Why?
@Graingy
Can I be in the company :3
Additionally, what colour? Yellow? White? Orange? Black?
@Boeing727200F How unsportsmanlike!
I'll have to-
Wait.
How tall were they? Above or below 160cm?
@Graingy hu-
gets nuked by PS-562 pre anything
@Boeing727200F A joke indeed.
Shall I arrange a duel?
Giving others a fighting chance for fun is a long-held Soian tradition. If he's not busy I'm sure he'd be down for a match.
I... should warn you, however. Even not using Influence mechanisms, he has an Apparent Mass of over 13 tonnes. Don't get squished.
@Graingy
gimme some prep time and a shovel imma defeat PS-562
(oh and if you are wondering, this is a joke that in Minecraft I randomly prefer a iron shovel out of anything to go and kill shit with)