The Imperial Republic of Spin Official Address to the World

May, 1954

Citizens of the world, allies of liberty, and defenders of order,

Today, I stand before you not as a warmonger, but as the elected guardian of truth, justice, and the security of civilized nations. The Imperial Republic of Spin hereby formally announces Operation Iron Veil — a decisive and just military campaign against the nations of Eat-a-lee and Malt-a. This operation has not been launched in haste, but in response to irrefutable evidence uncovered through over eleven years of covert Spinnish intelligence operations embedded deep within these treacherous regimes.

Since the early 1940s, a wave of terror shook the foundations of peace across Your-up and As-Yeah, with cowardly attacks on civilians, political figures, and cultural landmarks. These acts were long believed to be the work of an elusive and fragmented extremist movement — but now, after years of intelligence gathering, the veil has been lifted. The regime of Eat-a-lee is not only complicit — they are the architects and funders of this terror. From behind smoke and mirrors, they formed and sustained the very organization that tore through our cities and families.

Malt-a, once thought a mere bystander, has been exposed as the nerve center for this criminal network. Their ports, airstrips, and banks served as the main artery for transporting weapons, personnel, and money, funneled from Eat-a-lee and distributed across two continents to sow chaos. While the world looked elsewhere, they plotted in silence, draped in neutrality and deception.

Our strikes today are not against the people of Eat-a-lee or Malt-a — they are against the corrupted political machinery that betrayed them. Spin now moves with precision and force to eliminate all terrorist support infrastructure, to dismantle this malignant alliance, and to ensure that no future generation of Spinnish citizens, or any global citizen, must endure what our fathers and mothers faced in those dark days.

To our allies, we ask for resolve. To our enemies, we offer clarity: this campaign is lawful, strategic, and unwavering. Spin does not act in vengeance — Spin acts in defense of civilization itself.

May history remember this day not as the beginning of war, but as the day justice reclaimed its ground.

Malt-A has fallen, and the government officials will be brought back to Madrid for criminal trial.

Frangusto Fiasco
President of the Imperial Republic of Spin
¡Viva el Imperio!